Author Archives: Christine Arylo

Self-Love Spark: Feeling left out or rejected? Heal your heart with this.

Transmute the feelings of abandonment, rejection, and being uninvited with this video from the Divine Heart and My Heart to yours!

I don’t think there is a one of us who hasn’t had our heart hurt because we felt excluded – not invited to the party, the dinner, the project, the meeting, the whatever. And when that happens, doesn’t it feel like you are 7 years old again and you didn’t get invited to sit at the cool kids table. Ouch. Rejection hurts

Heart hurt girl

 

In the past few weeks I’ve had moments when I have felt left out and it really hurt. And I saw so clearly how I had the power to either get mad and blame others and keep the hurt going OR… choose to mother those tender parts in myself, reject the story of being abandoned or excluded and look for evidence of more love.

It wasn’t easy but I chose to reject rejection!

You see, if you don’t transform the dark parts inside your heart that have been hurt, they just keep operating under the surface, driving you to be passive aggressive, resentful, and dark goo eeks out all over your relationships, choices and thoughts – creating the opposite of what you want, which is love. But when you pause, tap into this full moon love energy, and transmute the hurt into love, you become free and you can actually create more loving relationships and release those abandonment triggers.

From a spiritual perspective, you can’t really be rejected anyway, even though that’s what it feels like at the time.

Often what appears like rejection is just the Divine’s way of redirecting you to what is better for you. It’s your attachment to where that love and inclusion comes from that creates the suffering and feelings of rejection.

 

In the moment, when we feel left out or rejected, we owe it to ourselves to acknowledge the little part of us that is hurt, and then respond from the EMPOWERED part of us who has options, and who does not give their love power – the feeling of being loved and like you belong – away to anyone. The BEST three empowered acts you can take the next time you feel left out is lean in to love by:

  1. Other-love... Invite yourself to whatever it is, without attachment to whether they say yes or no
  2. Self-Love… Ask yourself what YOU want to do and do that – you don’t need others to feel loved.
  3. Divine-love.. Ask the Divine what it wants to do with you, what it’s trying to lead you to instead that is even better for you.

You have the power to reject rejection too, but you have to be willing to release the rejection story and see the divine truth.

And from a human heart perspective, you still need someone to witness the hurt so you can let it go and open up the space to see Divine Love’s hand who is just trying to move you to more grace!
 

So today, here on the self-love blog, I invite you to post up your heart hurt from feeling rejected, uninvited or left out. Just let yourself be 7 years old. Then change the story! And I will send that part of you LOTS OF LOVE!

 

1. My heart hurt… (name the rejection starting point)
2. I told myself … (name the story you told yourself about it)
3. The truth is that.. (take your love power back and state the truth from a place of self authority)

 
I will go first:

My heart hurt when some of my best friends were involved in a project that they didn’t invite me to be part of.
I told myself that they were excluding me.
The truth is that me not being included doesn’t mean they don’t love me. And that the Divine is guiding me to other projects that are even better for me

 

Now Your Turn..

My heart hurt…
I told myself..
The truth is…

 
And if you want more support and guidance on creating the happiest relationships of your life – not easy – but possible when you really truly take your love power back, check out the 40 Day Choosing ME before WE practice at http://www.choosingmebeforewe.com

Great Mother Love Meditation – When life is too much, do this.

Watch this Great Mother Love video and meditation & surrender what’s weighing on your heart

I don’t know why we think when we grow up that we are supposed to be all strong, and have it all together. That when we become parents or responsible adults that we won’t get scared or confused. That when life is hard we should just buck up and push through, instead of doing what a little kid would do – have a little cry, wrap up in a blankie, and ask it’s mom to make it all better with a kiss, a hug and her magic wand.

Now that’s what I am talking about – Great Mother Love.

We all need it, yet most of us have no idea how to get it.

You need Great Mother Love in the times when life feels like it’s too much… like it’s is too hard… like there’s not enough… like the burden is just too heavy… like you might even want to give up and quit.

From a spiritual perspective, these intense times are all good. It just means the shadow is coming up to be healed and transmuted into light. But from a human perspective, while you are wading through the shadow, no matter how much light is promised at the end of the tunnel, what you really want to do is crawl into bed, wrap the covers over you and come out when it’s all over?

But you can’t. People need things from you, you have to go to work, all that stuff that’s contributing to the stress in the first place!

So what can you crawl into and wrap yourself up with? Great Mother Love! Great Mother Love, when you tune into it and open to receive it is like receiving a big huge hug and kiss from the divine, or the best mother that you could ever imagine who has the power to take it all away and make it better… a place where you can just lay your head on her shoulder and let it all go… and SURRENDER all that you don’t want to carry any longer.

So how do you get to this Great Mother Love? Well that’s what this video, meditation and surrender stuff is all about.

Let’s alleviate some of this fear, doubt, stress, anxiety shall we and get you connected to Great Mother Love, shall we?

Follow these steps.

1. Watch the divine spark video I taped for you, which includes the Great Mother Love meditation

2. Give over to her what you want to surrender right now. The burden, responsiblity, fear, anxiety, and be specific. Really give it to her and let her heart take the weight off your heart.

3. Post your SURRENDER PRAYER up here on the self-love blog “I SURRENDER… And I will post back and witness and super charge your prayer.

4. Open up to receive Great Mother Love from all the places and people it shows up through, including yourself. Great Mother Love feels like caring, nurturing, embracing, sweetness, nourishing, warm, unconditional, empty of all fear. Include it in your post by saying “I AM OPEN TO RECEIVING GREAT MOTHER LOVE!)

Here’s my surrender prayer to the Great Mother

I SURRENDER THE RESPONSIBILITY OF BEING THE ONE IN MY FAMILY THAT HAS TO FIGURE IT ALL OUT, TO BE THE ONE WHO MAKES SURE ITS ALL TAKEN CARE OF AND WE HAVE EVERYTHING WE NEED. I AM TIRED OF TAKING IT ALL ON AND I SURRENDER THIS BURDEN! TAKE IT GREAT MOTHER. I AM OPEN TO RECEIVING YOUR GREAT MOTHER LOVE.

Okay now your turn! Post on the self-love blog

Really let the energy flow and FEEL IT as you write it – remember it’s your surrender prayer, let it go and open up that heart to great mother love, let her divinity take on what your humanity could never hold.

Choose Relationships that Support You to Soar … that’s self-love!

A wise man once said to me, the relationships in your life can either be like wind beneath your wings supporting you to soar, or they can be like heavy weights that drag you down and keep you from flying free. I married that smart man – Noah Martin – and in the process have created not just a marriage that has supported me to do my great work and live my life’s dreams, but created an entire web of love that has allowed me to step forward past fear and uncertainty to go for my dreams full out! Now that is self-love.

Today, in honor of my marriage anniversary to said wise man (that’s he and I on our wedding day nine years ago), I taped this divine spark from my heart to invite you to feel the gratitude for the love you have around you that supports you so well… and to also be honest about the ways in which you are blocking love from supporting you – through relationships that drain you or by letting fear keep your heart from reaching out and receiving the love you need to do your great work and live your great life.

Christine Arylo and Noah Martin

Think of any dream you have and the reason you aren’t living it now. Somewhere in there will be a belief about how you can’t do it because you don’t have the $ money or the time. But if you wait for when you have the extra $ or time you think you need to live your dream, you will be too old to enjoy it!  When you choose to grow your LOVE WEALTH – you will create around you the support, security and resources you need to live your dream now.

The only reason I could sell my house and my car, and become a spiritual gypsy, traveling around the world not knowing always where I would live or sleep was because of the massive LOVE WEALTH that surrounded me – in the form of soul family whose house I always had a place… in the form of ‘strangers’ that became new  fast friends and miraculously had beautiful homes they needed watched or lived in… in the form of spiritual mentors who had done walkabouts before and lent their hand to me to help me steady in the moments I got scared… to the big hunk of man I married that helped keep me grounded and feeling safe as I slept in 20 different beds in two months this spring. Love wealth.

Now I offer you the choice to expand your love wealth and let it come in to support you and your dreams to FLY!

Watch the divine spark that I taped for you above and then tapping into all this love energy. I invite you to take the following action here on the self-love blog – Noah and i will witness your stand for love together and super charge your choice to let love support your dreams.

ONE:  Feel the love wealth you have.   “I feel so much love from…

TWO:  See where you are blocking love from coming in to support you to fly.  “I am blocking love by…

THREE: Open your heart and take one bold action to remove the block and let love flow in so you and your heart desire can soar. “I choose to open my heart to love by…

Okay I will go first…

“I feel so much love from Noah, my spiritual mentors and my beloved soul sisters Anne, Shiloh and Christine and my goddess daughters Lucie and Janey who always meet me with love… I am blocking love by not reaching out to ‘celebrities’ who are also embracing the self love message so we can connect and power up self love even more – like Katie Perry, Elizabeth Gilbert, Indie Arie – because my Inner Mean Girl tells me I would be bugging them. I choose to open my heart to love, by reaching out to these three light beams and telling them how much I appreciate their work and also ask for their support in self love day and my new book – yikes!”

Now your turn to post here on the self love blog… One… you feel so much love from… Two… you are blocking love by…. Three… your bold action — open up to love baby and FLY! Noah and I are standing by to witness you and share our special love mojo with you 🙂

Sustain Don’t Drain Yourself… a self care practice to transform the things that drain you

Yes, you want to take care of yourself. Yes, you want your life to feel in balance, in harmony. You want to feel vital, strong, and cared for. You know self care is good. Yet there are many things that can come into your ‘field’ (your body, mind, emotions, relationships, life) that drain your resources (time, energy, money, peace, life force)… and you simply can’t afford to have these things depleting you.

Self care is making sure that YOU receive what you need. Self care requires you never serve from your reserves. Which means you need to SUSTAIN not DRAIN your energy.


How? Well watch this self love spark I taped for YOUR HEART, to slow down, and take a look at your ‘field’ to see what is draining you. Be honest. Your life force depends on it.

I taped this video for you on the equinox, which is all about balance. It literally is the mid point between the solstices, and it’s a time to take stock of the field you’ve planted (think agriculture and growing crops which is a metaphor for the field and crop of your life each year.) And as you take stock of your personal field, your life, this is the time to choose to harvest what will sustain you over the winter and choose to compost that which is draining or no longer nurturing.

So, as you watch this video, really tune into yourself and honestly answer these two questions…

WHAT IN MY LIFE DRAINS ME?
WHAT IN MY LIFE SUSTAINS ME?

This could be relationships, jobs, situations, ways you work, finances, anything really. Don’t hold back. Be honest with yourself. Even if that means admitting your job, your kids, your whatever are draining you. Because once you can be honest about the drain, you can see the ways in which you can transform the drain into something that sustains you or at the very least stops draining you. And here’s the other thing to note – something that once sustained you could now drain you, and it’s up to you to see when that balance shifts, and then love yourself enough to respond to new circumstances and make the shifts inside of yourself and your life to create a most sustainable life.

Empower yourself to take care of yourself, right here on the self love blog, with these three steps …

 

ONE – “What currently drains me is… ” (admit and name one, be specific so you can see the drain)

TWO – “It also sustains me by...” (there’s some way it does give to you, and you want to keep this because  it’s supportive)

THREE – And then make your self care claim…

I CHOOSE TO SUSTAIN MYSELF NOT DRAIN MYSELF! 

and then i will witness you!

 

Christine arylo self care poster

Here i will go first.

“One…What currently drains me is having to figure out where Noah and I are going to be living, where home will be, because of our spiritual gypsy lifestyle. It drains me because I have to keep reorienting my energy to the new space,  to other people’s space, so I never feel quite settled in myself. Two… It also sustains me by allowing me to travel to be wherever spirit guides me, or wherever I want to be, because I don’t have a mortgage or home or pets to take care of. Three… I CHOOSE TO SUSTAIN MYSELF NOT DRAIN MYSELF!”

(Note: This gypsy lifestyle has been perfect for me the last 17 months since I sold my home and Noah and I took to the road. And now, at equinox, as the seasons shift, it’s time for something new, because it’s draining me more than sustaining me. And now that I can see the pieces that drain and sustain I can make shift happen.)

So love… what is ready to shift for you ? What stand will you take to SUSTAIN not DRAIN yourself.  Write it here on the self love blog, your stand for self care… what drains me… what sustains me…